Nothing's gonna change my world

Lately I have been noticing the ease and freedom of how we live, shop, move about this town. One thing people are quick to tell you when you announce your pregnancy (as if you really needed them to say it) is that "your life will never be the same again." I want to say "Wait...what!?" It's obvious that life will not ever be the same as it was B.C. (before children). But, there is also this tone in the way that they say it which seems like people almost delight in the presumed loss of fun, independence and traveling that you will face as soon as your baby arrives. I know that things will not be easy logistically anymore and of course we will make adaptations, but I don't like how some people act like they are martyrs once they have children.

Today in yoga class we had a substitute instructor. When I came in the class she had the Beatles song, "Across the Universe" playing. Before she started class she said that she loved how she could hear everyone kind of singing or humming the tune to themselves. I do love that song! Then she said she had a realization she wanted to share. She said "Nothing's gonna change your world." I'm thinking "Wait...what!?" She said that having a baby will rock your world, but nothing will change your world. She went on to explain that if you are a joyous person, for example, your child will reflect that joy and likewise if your life is in disarray. I thought about it for a second because this was the exact opposite thing that people had been telling me before (i.e. everything is going to change). The instructor said that we are who we are and we will share that with our babies, not change as a result of them.

I continued to think about it and about couples that I knew BC and now that they have kids. Those who were laid back, happy, positive, non-anxious BC, are still mostly that way. And the ones who were rigid, anxious and overbearing BC, are still that way! There is something comforting in knowing that we can maintain the parts of ourselves that we want, and are not forced to abandon them just because someone now calls us "Mom." And when I think about myself and the life experiences and transitions I have had, like getting married...I am still the same as I was before that! Life is enhanced, but my world is not changed. ((Sigh of Relief))

So as I continue through the remaining 15 weeks of pregnancy, I want to keep this in mind. There is so much fear and anxiety that labor and birthing evokes and this idea of being strong and not unwavering is kind of empowering!